Seeking Approval and Controlling Parents




Seeking Approval is energy draining. Use your energy on improving yourself.

Today we have an E-mail from a viewer who is a young man and needs some help with the dating process when it comes to meeting women. I’ve noticed he is seeking approval from her to a level that is unacceptable, but I congratulate him for writing in and having his questions answered. If you have a question you can email me at and I will reply to it in a video if you want.

Below he writes:

“Starting out, I have Asperger’s syndrome. It’s basically means I’m autistic , but with a really high IQ score. Not using it as a crutch, excuse, or anything, but just to tell you that most dating conventions and other shit aren’t natural, or were not natural to me. So let me breakdown my situation:

* Very popular @ school, work and anywhere else (This is good. Popularity draws women’s eyes to you)

* Can easily spit girls who are interested (We’ll touch more on this later)

* In shape. Gay people say I could be a model, so I guess that’s a plus. (Always a plus, gay men have high visual standards for appearance)

* Inner game is solid 

* Solid understanding of frame and how to maintain it

* Black, if that changes anything  (Only if you were Green. If you had green skin this would change everything.)

Now I know I’m high SMV (SMV=Sexual market value aka how much your value is perceived by women.) because the creme de la creme are making eye contact, smiling, doing that annoying giggling thing when with their friends, (this is really good: eye contact alone is a huge predictor that a woman is interested in you) other shit like that. What’s the problem ? I don’t know how to start the process of dating, or how to bring it up to where it’s not awkward. (This is where you start the process of seeking approval, by wanting to not make it awkward you’re worried about her perception of you. In the ideal case she should be seeking approval from you. She should be worried of your perception of her. Because this is the natural order of things, men lead and women follow.)  There is this process of “talking”, which is like pre-dating I guess, and then dating, and all this other shit which I’m okay with, as long as my wood ends up in there fireplace.

Do I just tell her what I expect out of the relationship, or just make moves? (Just make moves, again you are seeking approval. She does not need to know what your expectations are of the relationship and even if she doesn’t agree with your expectations, who cares? The most important person in your relationship is you and your happiness.)

On another note, a few of these girls have boyfriends. ( I personally advise staying away from girls who have boyfriends but cheat on them. Those women are messed up in the head and you don’t want them causing drama in your life.) Most of them beta males. One of the girls happens to be Albanian, with a perfect ass and long hair ( long hair is beautiful and feminine. Good things to find in a woman), which I’m intent on fucking. Another is almost a midget ( short girls are great in bed cause you can move them easily) , but is kinda cute with the fattest ass ever. So there is a lot of potential pussy ,but I don’t know how to move with these boyfriends, or boyfriend related drama. (Just avoid the drama. No woman is worth it.)

Lastly, and this is going to sound extremely bitchy, but parents. My mom is extremely cunning, at least when it comes to her kids. Example? Instead of going to college, I was supposed to help running my step dad’s business while he’s away ( which she has done horribly, btw). Instead, she strong armed me into joining the army, and isolated my step dad to where she is the only voice in his head.( You have got to move out and go on with your life.) My mother is extremely controlling (RUN RUN RUN she thinks she is helping you but actually she is hurting you. Controlling mothers usually have good intentions but they tend to prioritize a man’s life with safety like a woman’s life. But men don’t need safety. We need adventure to grow and learn as men. We need challenges. Safety does not provide this) , and I’m lucky enough to be Red Pill aware without a father figure for most of my life, which pisses her off. (She should be happy for you, not upset at your independence) Due to me naively talking about The Red Pill with her, she has grown increasingly distrustful of me, and I’m basically in jail at the moment. This isn’t a huge problem, there are opportunities to sneak off, but how should/could/would this affect my game?” (It’s affecting your game negatively because you don’t have a place to bring the girl back to and also you have to deal with an overbearing mother who is constantly in your mind and ears with her words. Unnecessary stress and non productive energy in your life. Time to get out! )

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